Another attempt at a serious post.

One of of my little struggles over the past few months has been letting go.  And not so much the letting go physical objects, like old cloths  Hell, I gave away my comicbook collection to my cousin without a second thought when we moved to Bangladesh.

The problem, MY problem, is letting go of ideas.  Some ideas, snuck into shadowy nooks and crannies of the unconscious mind and took root over the years that followed.  At the time, they were something to look forward to.  Dreams of a magical “Someday” when all would be right with the world, and various associations.

A mild example of the first would be analog art.  There are, literally, a ton of paper in my room with “art” containing ideas that are barely ¹⁄₂ formed.  (²⁄5 formed? ³⁄₈ Formed? ^√146689⁄768 formed?)  And as long as I have that ton of paper in my room, there are a buttload of “somedays” to look forward to, where those incomplete bits are turned into some of the greatest works of art known to mankind.  The problem with this is, primarily it clogs up the to-do list.

The second problem with this is, tropical weather and paper don’t mix very well.  Sitting on a ton of potential fungus outbreak is not the most intelligent of decisions.

The second problem, I think has to do to some extent, with my collector mentality.  There’s just something about collecting, getting and keeping things in order that appeals to me.  The problem is, it works pretty well for the first few years.  As an ex-ad-man I have something of an interest in package design, and find a certain amount of enjoyment in looking at the development and progress of … say… packaging over the years.  And the occasional oddities, like Mecca Cola , or a locally produced orange flavored drink called “Tank”.

It’s not that I get up every day to inspect my ton of unfinished analog artwork, or ogle through my Mecca Cola merchandise.

It’s just that, whenever I start planning about cleaning things up, these old ideas come up and start nagging -”Oh, I can’t throw away this piece of paper containing ⁷⁄42 of three stick figures on what appears to be a space-faring canoe.  This is suppose to be the beginnings of my concept art for ‘Invasion of the Cake People From Beyond Venus’.”  Or “I can’t throw away that partially dented can of Mecca-Cola.  That’s part of marketing history.”

Anyways, at this point, I’ve come to see my attempts at solving some problems as problems themselves.  And dealing with that seems to be helping progress.

…

Though I really should start working on “Invasion of the Cake People From Beyond Venus” again.

Ant.  Boot.  Quarrel.
’nuff said.

Hello.

If you are reading this, chances are you may have also noticed my sudden disappearance for the last six months or there about.

Things have been… interesting.  Disturbingly interesting.

A decade or so ago, I was dealing with a combination of the Blues (pretty straight forward 0x0000ff stuff) and procrastination.  And, I like to think that over the years I got fairly decent at dealing with the aforementioned Blues & procrastination.  It took years, but still…

Then, whether for better or for worse, things went (what I like to call) Indigo.  A comparatively complicated 0x4b0082, or as I like to think of it, the Ludicrous Speed to Blues’ Warp.

Blues brought with it an assortment of fears & doubts & what have you-s and tangled you up pretty badly, but once you figured out you were tangled up, it became easier to cut your way out of it.

Indigo makes you think you’re cutting your way out of said tangles, even though you’re actually not.  And the majority of my time during the last six months was spend doing just that.  Thinking I was working my way towards a goal, when I wasn’t.

So… what happens now?  I have no idea.  (Aside from the heads up that my posts might become a bit more philosophical in nature.)

So… errr… that’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it.